My Dear Wife,

The FIFA World cup is around the corner, so let me give you a few rules that will help us during the months of June and July:

致親愛(ài)的妻子，

世界杯在即，為了在六月和七月能友好相處，請(qǐng)?jiān)试S我與您約法三章

1. The Television set's remote control belongs to me for the whole month。

電視遙控器歸我掌控一個(gè)月。

2. You should not walk in front of TV whenever I am watching any match, you better freeze where you are or crawl on the floor。

我看比賽的時(shí)候請(qǐng)不要擋住我的視線，或者站立不動(dòng)，或者趴在地板上。

3. You must support the same team I support。

請(qǐng)務(wù)必和我支持同一球隊(duì)。

4. No talking during the games, wait until Half-time or end of the game。

比賽期間請(qǐng)保持安靜，有話請(qǐng)等到中場(chǎng)休息或者比賽結(jié)束。

5. Repeats and match Highlights are as good as live matches, So I will watch them too。

重播和精彩瞬間與現(xiàn)場(chǎng)直播同等重要，我也不能錯(cuò)過(guò)。

6. We can see movies/home videos provided actors and actresses are wearing soccer jerseys and they are in Brazil。

如果男演員和女演員穿著球衣，故事也發(fā)生在巴西，看看他們演的電影或者家庭錄像也是可以的。

7. Tell all your friends not to give birth or get married during the World Cup because we won't have time to attend their ceremonies。

通知你的朋友們，世界杯期間不要結(jié)婚生子，因?yàn)槲覀儧](méi)有時(shí)間參加典禮。

8. Make sure you don't ask silly questions such as; is that Chelsea versus China? (Chelsea is a football club in England and China is not participating in this year's world cup finals) 。

請(qǐng)保證不要問(wèn)我以下愚蠢問(wèn)題：這是切爾西對(duì)中國(guó)的比賽么?(切爾西是英國(guó)的足球俱樂(lè)部，而中國(guó)并沒(méi)有進(jìn)入這次世界杯決賽圈。)

9. No funny faces to my friends whenever they come to watch matches with me。

我的朋友們來(lái)家里和我一起看球的時(shí)候不要鬧笑話。

10. Smile every time EXCEPT when my team is losing ...hope you get me clear?

除了我支持的球隊(duì)輸球的時(shí)候，你想怎么笑都可以……我說(shuō)清楚了么?

11. Your baby must not cry during any match , it's better you drugged him or her with Breast milk。

比賽期間保證孩子不要哭鬧，哭的時(shí)候就給他喂奶。