14. Build a network。
建立起交際網(wǎng)。
Become people's information source, and let them be yours. A former coworker might have gotten a new position at that company where you've always wanted to work. Go to them for a beer, and ask about the company. It's all about connections and information。
做別人的信息源，也讓別人成為你的信息源。以前的同事可能在你心儀已久的公司里找到了新工作。和他們一起喝一杯，然后詢(xún)問(wèn)那個(gè)公司的情況。一切都是關(guān)于聯(lián)系和信息。
15. If you are angry at the person in front of you who's driving like a grandmother .。.
如果你對(duì)前面開(kāi)車(chē)慢得像老太婆的人很生氣……
Pretend it is your grandmother — it will significantly reduce your road rage。
就當(dāng)那個(gè)人是個(gè)老太婆吧——這能大大減輕你的路怒癥。
16. Stand up straight。
站直。
No slouching, hands out of pockets, and head held up high. It's not just a cliche — you literally feel better and people around you feel more confident in you。
不要沒(méi)精打采的，把手從褲兜里掏出來(lái)，把頭抬高。這不僅是陳詞濫調(diào)——你真的會(huì)覺(jué)得更好，你身邊的人也會(huì)對(duì)你有更多的信心。
17. Avoid saying "I think" and "I believe" unless absolutely necessary。
除了非說(shuō)不可時(shí)，避免說(shuō)“我覺(jué)得”和“我相信”。
These are phrases that do not evoke confidence, and will literally do you no good。
這些短語(yǔ)不能激發(fā)自信，對(duì)你不會(huì)有任何實(shí)質(zhì)的益處。
18. When feeling anxious, clean up your home or work space。
覺(jué)得焦慮的時(shí)候，整理一下你的房子或者工作區(qū)域。
You will feel happier and more accomplished than before。
你會(huì)比以前感覺(jué)更加快樂(lè)和有成就感。
19. Always buy the first pitcher or round of drinks。
永遠(yuǎn)買(mǎi)第一壺或者第一桶飲料。
You'd be surprised how long you can drink on the phrase "I bought the first one."
你能邊喝邊說(shuō)：“我是第一個(gè)買(mǎi)的。” 你能說(shuō)這句話的時(shí)間會(huì)長(zhǎng)到讓自己驚奇。
20. Going into an interview ... be interested in your interviewers。
去面試的時(shí)候……對(duì)你的面試官感興趣。
If you focus on learning about them, you seem more interesting and dynamic. (Again, people love to talk about themselves。)
如果你重點(diǎn)放在了解他們，你會(huì)顯得自己更加有趣和有精力。(再說(shuō)一次，人們喜歡談?wù)撟约骸?
21. Pay attention, parents: Always give your kid a choice that makes them think they are in control。
父母?jìng)儯⒁饬耍嚎偸墙o你的小孩選擇，讓他們覺(jué)得自己在控制事情。
For instance, when I want my son to put his shoes on, I say, "Do you want to put on your Star Wars shoes or your shark shoes?"
例如，當(dāng)我想讓我兒子穿鞋時(shí)，我會(huì)問(wèn)：“你是想穿上你那雙星球大戰(zhàn)的鞋子還是那雙鯊魚(yú)的鞋子?”
Pro-tip: In some cases, this works on adults。
進(jìn)一步的小貼士：在某些情況下，這對(duì)成年人同樣有效。
22. Your actions affect your attitudes more than your attitudes affect your actions。
你的行為影響你的態(tài)度，而不是你的態(tài)度影響你的行為。
As my former teacher said, "You can jump and dance FOR joy, but you can also jump and dance yourself joyful."
就像我以前的老師說(shuō)的：“你可以為了開(kāi)心去蹦蹦跳跳，但是你蹦蹦跳跳就能讓自己開(kāi)心了。”
23. When a group of people laugh, people will instinctively look at the person they feel closest to in that group。
當(dāng)一群人笑的時(shí)候，人們會(huì)本能地去看那群人中讓他們覺(jué)得最親近的人。
24. If you want to build rapport or gain someone's trust quickly, match their body posture and position。
如果你想要和某人建立起密切的關(guān)系，或者快速得到某人的信任，和他們的身體姿勢(shì)和位置保持一致。
If someone is sitting with her legs crossed, cross your legs. Matching body position is a subconscious way to tell if someone trusts you or is comfortable with you。
如果某人兩腿交叉地坐著，你也雙腿交叉。是否和別人的身體位置保持一致是一種判斷某人是否信賴(lài)你或者和你相處愉快的下意識(shí)的方式。
25. The Benjamin Franklin Effect。
本杰明·富蘭克林效應(yīng)。
The pencil one may seem far-fetched, but I find the basis of it (the Benjamin Franklin effect) is very useful and extends far beyond pencil borrowing. This knowledge is useful in the world of flirting too。
鉛筆似乎對(duì)你來(lái)說(shuō)有些遙遠(yuǎn)，但是我發(fā)現(xiàn)它(本杰明·富蘭克林效應(yīng))的基礎(chǔ)是非常有用的，遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)超過(guò)借鉛筆。這個(gè)知識(shí)在調(diào)情的世界里也很有用。
Asking a girl in your class if you can borrow a pencil or to explain the homework will make her more likely to like you than if you let her borrow your stuff or are the one to help her. The best part is that it kills three birds with one stone: You get the advantages of the favor itself, the person subconsciously likes you more, and it makes them more open to future favors and conversation。
問(wèn)你們班的一個(gè)女生借鉛筆或者讓她給你講作業(yè)，比你把東西借給她或者你幫助她，更有可能讓她喜歡上你。最好的一點(diǎn)就一石三鳥(niǎo)：你得到了幫助帶來(lái)的好處、幫你的人下意識(shí)地更加喜歡你了，而且這件事讓他們更有可能在未來(lái)繼續(xù)幫助你或者和你交談。
小編注：【本杰明·富蘭克林效應(yīng)的故事】本杰明·富蘭克林曾表示，通過(guò)向一個(gè)不喜愛(ài)他的議員借書(shū)，他們倆最終成為了要好的朋友。認(rèn)知失調(diào)理論的解釋為，如果我們?nèi)椭粋�(gè)不喜歡的人，結(jié)果說(shuō)不定就會(huì)喜歡上他—— 當(dāng)我們給予不喜歡的人幫助時(shí)，其實(shí)是經(jīng)歷了一種失調(diào)，我們的行為和對(duì)此人的態(tài)度之間發(fā)生了矛盾。為了緩解這種失調(diào)，我們會(huì)盡力說(shuō)服自己這個(gè)人是好的、值得幫助的，從而注意并強(qiáng)調(diào)了其優(yōu)點(diǎn)，而淡化了自己本來(lái)不喜愛(ài)他的事實(shí)。
